Newwww Blog!!

I decided that this blog was intended for foooooood shtuff. I want to keep it that way- really mostly for giggles...

anywho

my new blog issss:

lynzisays.com!

GOGOGO!! follow that one if you want the more... personal-y stuff!

A Mug of Tea and Some Advice

This morning is a chilly one in lovely South Dakota. I've lived here for several months now but there is still something so novel about life here. It's so charmingly quirky and beautiful. Because it's a particularly shivery (almost!) spring morning, I decided a cup of pomegranate green tea would be an appropriate start. I don't know what it is about tea that makes me feel a bit... thoughtful. But I'm feeling like hammering out a little bit of a blog so here goes.

A good portion of the time I'm thinking about, therefore talking about, weight loss. And throughout my journey, several things have occurred to me. The latest epiphany of sorts is applicable to absolutely everyone regardless of what you've experienced in life.

You must appreciate yourself.

There are so many struggles the world presents to us in our lives that the last place our worries should focus is on our disrespect, even hatred, for ourselves. I know for me, self respect has been something I have completely lacked from the start and it's something I have to force myself to do on a daily basis. It's much harder than it sounds. When you've spent so much time despising yourself, it gets tricky trying to convince your mind to see things in a different way. When so much energy is spend on wishing you were someone else, somewhere else, it's difficult to begin to truly see what amazing gifts you have been given. Here is my advice both to myself and to you, whoever you may be.

Let it go.

Stop talking to yourself the way you'd talk to an enemy. (Though, to be honest, the things I've said to myself I'd never say to someone else, the words are that cruel.) You are the one person that has no choice but to step up to the plate for yourself. It makes almost zero sense to allow yourself to continue a rampant hatred of the person you are because you have no choice. There is no negotiating with nature. You can change the outside, sure, but it takes a lot of work to change the way you feel about yourself. The quirks we all have are ours to hold on to. The things we seem to deplore so much about ourselves are virtually the only things we will ever have that absolutely no one else can take from us. Whether you see yourself as too sensitive or not sensitive enough, too weak, too headstrong, if you think you have a weird laugh or a strange taste in music or films or any of the things we all see in ourselves as negative, know that these are the things that make you you. These are the little things that make people fall in love with you, the things that make our world so unique and beautiful. Do yourself a favor and appreciate that you are alive. Appreciate that you are unique, that you aren't just a carbon copy of flesh and bone produced on a factory line. There are so many people in your world that appreciate it too. At the end of the day, as hippy dippy as it may sound, you really just have to

Love yourself.

The chilly Saturday morning record:

"It Ain't Me Babe" --Bob Dylan (on repeat)

I Love You Like a Fat Kid Loves Cake. [[Cupcakes]]

In this case, I'm the fat kid... or the "not-really-as-fat-anymore-and-quickly-becoming-not-fat-at-all" kid. But regardless of labels, I love cake. And I love you!! So what if you might be a creepy dude with a killer 'stache. I still love you. But mostly, I love cake. Cupcakes. Cakes you bake in cups. I've never made vegan cupcakes before so I quickly googled a recipe and went at it. I added too much vanilla to both the cake batter and the frosting, so it's a little on the overwhelming side but they're really still pretty good. And whole wheat. And vegan! It's a win situation any way you look at it, really. I believe the recipe was from "Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World" but a good cupcake recipe is easy to find if you use that trusty google machine! Another option is to vegan-ify an omni style recipe by using replacements for the non-vegan items. Voila! Cupcakes!

Work it out!

Today was my first Saturday Challenge work-out: 26 miles as fast as you can. I came up with it to see what it was like to 1. set and accomplish a fitness goal and 2. see what it's like to finish a marathon length work out. I only have my stationary bike right now, but that's good enough for me! It gets my heart pumping and my legs working.

My stats were: 26.03 miles, 87:45 minutes, and 485 calories burned

Talk about working it out!

I can't figure out how to get the proof picture uploaded from my cellular device so you'll just have to take my word that I did it.

Baking playlist:

The entire Dookie album- Green Day

Long Time No Blog!

I am notorious for starting things and abandoning them, YouTube channels, blogs, myspace (who didn't with that last one, really?) etc. But my blog has always been on my mind... "I should blog this! ...nah... too lazy to get my camera, no one cares..." But then I remember that I shouldn't really care whether or not anyone else gives a damn about what I have to say, but that this blog was intended as a very public form of a diary and it has always been about what I need to say to myself. I'm reminded of this as I read through my last few posts. I'm reminded of the summer, of a boy and my first experience with heartbreak (which I pretended didn't bother me... but it really, really did.), my adventures with the vegan thing (a thing which I have not yet abandoned hope on) and how much growth I've really experienced over the last several months of being in South Dakota. People closest to me have noticed the shift, not only physically (can I get an AMEN?!) but in my personality as well. I guess I just seem more grown up? I think my priorities have just shifted.

A year ago I was a very unhappy 320 pound person. I ate my feelings and I ate down the feelings I had given myself from eating in the first place, a dangerous cycle of negativity that showed itself all over my body. I recognize that for some, losing a significant amount of weight really might not be that big of a deal. But on the other hand, I wonder how many people can balloon to over 300 pounds and not have some sort of emotional issue lurking around somewhere. That is a lot of weight to have allowed yourself to carry. At this point, I've lost 80 pounds. And while my inner pessimistic jerk is saying "uuuhh... you're still a fat ass. You have a long way to go, buddy... don't get excited." My shiny optimistic self is saying, and forgive my french, "FUCK YES!" For a few months there I hit a bit of a plateau and was getting a bit frustrated. That's when a little light switched on and said "duh, self! Exercise!" So I listened. I joined weight watchers--mostly because I want to be on a commercial... My success story is going to be so kick ass I'll become famous and filthy rich! Nah, I kid... kind of. In all reality, I needed a push in the right direction and Jennifer Hudson convinced me with her new "erms and legs." Using weight watchers I dropped 13 pounds in the first month. Not astonishing results but I'll take them. Most importantly though, I began exercising and not allowing myself to make excuses and holding myself accountable. I've put that stationary bike I got for Christmas (Thanks mom and dad!) to good use for sure. If you really want the nitty gritty of my workout routine I'll probably do a more in depth post later but basically, I stay on that bitch for an hour (averaging about 18 miles) and I try to challenge myself in some way or another. This weekend... I'm planning on "biking" the length of a marathon, 26-point-something miles. Meh. What's another 8 miles?!

Cultivating a healthy relationship with food has been tough to do on my own, but I've made a lot of progress. The hardest part of all of this is learning to cultivate a healthy relationship with myself, to allow my shiny optimistic self to rule my thoughts and be proud of what I've accomplished. I'm not where I want to be yet but I'm pretty much halfway there. So at this point I know for a fact that I can do whatever I want to do with my body, I can be how ever I want to be. And though my final goal is a ways down the road, I have a huge milestone a mere 20 pounds away, and another 20 pounds down from that. Rest assured, when both of these are met... there will be jumping and shouting... and probably shimmying. I am absolutely proud of myself and I think I have every right to be. I've put up with the horrid emotions a person goes through when changing their life, I've worked hard, I've made a difference and saved myself from a lifetime of really intense health problems. See?! No one needs a knight-in-shining armor! You can be your own hero! (Okay... maybe that's a bit much, but whatever.)